Baby Balance Sheet: A Family of 3 in Tulsa Earning $43K a Year
How they make an annual income of $43,500 work.
In This Article
The latest installment of Baby Balance Sheet features a young family living in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Their child care situation will feel familiar to some people. In Tulsa, the average cost of child care is more than $2,000 a month. When this family crunched the numbers, they decided it made more sense for them for the mom to stay home rather than spend the majority of her income on care.
As a result, their budget is tight, and she finds part-time work where she can, including teaching classes one day a week at their local cathedral, where her husband is a teacher. But the pair is resourceful: They’re in the process of buying their first home, thanks to a USDA loan that allows them to put 0% down. They also save money by using cloth diapers, which they plan to continue to use as they expand their family in the future.
Read on to see how this couple are spending and saving and managing life as a one-income household as a young family of three.
About me: I am a mostly stay-at-home mom, but I work one day a week assisting with classes at my local cathedral. My daughter can come with me to work, and she loves it! My husband is a forester by schooling, but he currently teaches middle and high school science at the school attached to the cathedral.
Age: I’m 24, and my husband is 22.
How old is your child? 14 months
Where do you live? Tulsa, Oklahoma
What is your family household income? $43,500 (before taxes)
Were you worried about being able to afford a baby? Why or why not?
We were not worried about it. We’ve been in really tight spots before, and we’ve always been seen through, so we trusted that if this was the timing chosen for us to have a baby then we would be taken care of now, too.
Did you have a savings goal before your baby arrived or are you working toward one now?
We tried to just save what we could. Our main priority wasn’t saving money explicitly but rather adjusting our budget for our baby! We really focused on quality over quantity when choosing baby items because we plan to continue to grow our family. I used my background in early childhood education to really pare down what we needed.
What kinds of financial tools (or tricks!) are you using to help reach your savings goals?
Spreadsheets have helped quite a bit, but we mostly use the budgeting tool our bank has on its app and website.
Are you setting up any savings accounts for your baby—like a 529, custodial account or something else? If yes, what kind of account(s) are you using?
We’ll set up a Trump account. We’re lucky that the baby’s grandparents and great grandparents have set up accounts for her for college and other expenses. My husband’s grandparents helped him and his brother pay for college, and they are doing the same for our daughter. We do have a life insurance plan for her, which she can choose to liquidate when she turns 18.
If you’re setting up a savings account for your baby, are you hoping friends or family might contribute to it too?
There’s only so many toys a baby needs, so we’d like to do “no gift” birthdays where we ask guests to contribute to our daughter’s college fund rather than buying more stuff.
When it comes to money, what part of having a baby (or raising a kid) feels most stressful?
We are stuck between a rock and a hard place with work arrangements. Only my husband can work full time, because if I went to work, 95% of my income would be going to child care. Instead, I have a couple of jobs where I can bring my baby. Unfortunately, there’s only so much I can make with those. And family comes first, so when my baby doesn’t feel good then I can’t work.
Are you receiving (or will you receive) any family help for paying for baby expenses?
Our daughter’s grandparents and great grandparents love shopping for her, so most of her clothes are from them. If not for them, we would be making great use of our local thrift stores for her clothes, as well as the big packs of clothes you can get from Gerber (which is what all of her pjs are).
How has your experience paying for Baby #1 influenced your thoughts on having a second baby?
Yes! Our second baby will actually be cheaper than our first because now we have all the diapers and most of the other supplies we need. We use cloth diapers, so we can reuse them for future kids! We trust that if we’re given another child then we will continue to be taken care of!
Can you share how much you spent on your baby in the last month?
Our family’s monthly grocery budget is about $300, and we’re good at sticking to that. We do buy more milk, yogurt, and fruit than we used to, but for the most part, our daughter eats the same as we do so food expenses are about the same. We buy wipes in bulk every two to three months, and they’re about $30 when we do. We use cloth diapers, so with the exception of occasionally buying a fun new pattern, we don’t have monthly diaper expenses! We have a special detergent we use to wash them, but we only buy that every four months or so, and it costs around $30. And we do a lot of laundry, but we’ve got a good routine now that makes it not just manageable but easy.
We are in the middle of buying a house, so we haven’t made contributions to her custodial accounts recently. We qualify for a USDA development loan, so we’re able to put zero down, and we managed to negotiate for the seller to pay the closing costs. In the end, our housing costs will decrease some (from $1,250 to $1,100 a month).
How much do you discuss the cost of raising a baby with your partner?
We talk about our finances often. We’re pretty frugal and very resourceful, so we’re pretty secure in where we’re at financially. At least a couple times a month we check in with how we’re doing and adjust as needed (i.e. if we’ve spent too much on our credit card, we’ll shift to use our debit account). We’re very fortunate to not be in debt (besides buying the house), but we are careful to keep our credit balanced and watch our extraneous expenses.
Any advice you’d give to new moms or families preparing for their first baby?
Lean on the people around you! Facebook Marketplace, church groups, mom groups, and friends can all be wonderful resources. Get comfortable with asking for help. We recently received four very full bags of clothes ranging in size from 12 months to 2T just because I asked. Be sure to make friends with people who already have kids, even if they’re a bit older than yours. You never know who has a spare crib or balance bike in their garage!
Navigating your money when you start having kids can be overwhelming. It’s so helpful to see how other families make it work. Want to share your story? Fill out the form here.
Babylist Money is here to help you feel confident managing your family finances, whether you want to understand how a 529 works, open a Trump Account, or start saving for Baby #2.
